Yesterday, I was in Wal-Mart and to be honest (as it makes the story better) I was on my way to the checkout counter (#1 to be exact) when a highly uptight black lady strides by my cart and orders me “come here” (to her new checkout counter #3) now as an American, I take slight umbrage to someone telling me what to do, especially in a uptight commandeering way – which was my initial feeling, but then I thought to myself – why is this person uptight? – well obviously, she comes from the hood, where the entire environment is uptight – in other words, she lacks love – so when I got to the counter I said “How are you” (genuinely) and her entire demeanor changed; she softened, she even went out of her way to do what she didn’t need to – place the bags in my shopping cart.

Now for the second story, without giving away too many details – there was someone, always uptight, who walked into our Synagogue this morning – again I went out of my way to greet the person with a friendly “Good morning” (again genuine) and though the response wasn’t great – a few minutes later they needed something and they came to me! – now I know what you are thinking – whoopee – “they need something and they came to you” – but yes, whoopee! – for it means this person, who feels the world is unsafe (which is why they are uptight) was able to feel that it is safe to approach someone.