Understanding the male female complementary dynamic

 

I recall, once a sweet married man told me, “my wife and I compliment each other!”

 

Most often in life, especially today, where the dynamics of social manipulation, of gender disidentification have permeated social consciousness, people are not aware of how men and women complement each other!

 

The reason this is so important is that when we see another as a compliment not a competition, we then are at peace, for we love what we see benefit in.

 

How are men and women complimentary forces!?

 

Most often, I think men in particular, see a certain competition, and hence treat marriage more as a game than a relationship!

 

The answer is as follows – in life as in a candle, two things are necessary, the soul and the body, the fire and the earth, the light and the darkness!

 

Without a soul / fire / light you have death, darkness and frozenness.

 

However, without a body, without earth, and without darkness, you haven’t place for a soul / fire / light to inhabit.

 

As the Rebbe teaches, the spirituality, the enthusiasm, the joy-da-vive in the home must come from the man (whom in any event have a predilection to grandiosity and the joy-da-vive it can bring) however, the home itself, the earth, the actual physical space of the light, must be contained within the woman’s presence~!!

 

In other words – and perhaps this can be recognized most succinctly in how men and women differ in bringing up children – most men have a, “just have fun, kid!” policy, which has its merits, because you want your kid unfettered wings; but on the other hand, most women are highly rigorous in their scheduling, in their bath times, in their homework etc. etc.; which also may be quite a good idea, because otherwise the child doesn’t know if he is coming or going!