The essence – as we see empirically, love – however as Kabbalah teaches, as God made selfless love so to selfish and also evil ( the sadistic pleasure of raping, controlling, demeaning, conniving – and it is this that actually drives – it is actually impossible for us to discern ( as all desires are subconsciously self-justified) the only possibility to remain pure, is through thoroughly despising a sadistic rapist abuser conniver, namely your own ego, as well as unconditionally- no conditions! forcing your body to obey the Divine suggestions