There are two types of pity, there is the compassion shown when someone is hurt, then there is the compassion shown to one whom one cherishes / loves; so despite the fact that all is well, one still does one’s utmost to benefit.
When a person has a negative thought, be it sexual, anger etc. one should realize that “Whatever I am thinking I cause God to be part of (or trapped in,” for as our soul is God, hence as the Alter Rebbe gives an example of a rope pulled at the bottom that causes the top to likewise descend – so your consciousness is connected to God) therefore whenever you find yourself in a negative thought, Remember!