“Managing Emotions” Teachings From Jewish Mysticism

What everyone everyone everyone really wants! – as Victor Frankel said: For their time on this earth to have been meaningful.

 

 

Purpose

 

Number one we must know where we are going.

 

Imagine a ship that is wandering aimlessly…  how do you think the passengers in the ship will feel??

 

Unless we know our lives have a meaningful goal, every step of the way leads to disappointment; often resentment which itself can lead to being irritable, which can lead to losing friends etc.

 

So what exactly is the reason G-d sent your soul onto earth??

 

Well the most famous Jewish prayer is “Shemah Yisrael Hashem Eloikeinu Hashem Echad” – in other words, we acknowledge that beauty is in diversity – it is the differences which create the joy of friendship! – This is why boys and girls, men and women, are attracted.

 

We must realize, that the singular God sort of split his soul into every person on earth – each soul is as Judaism says, “The soul of man is God’s soul!” So we long to unite with our other halves.

 

According to Jewish mysticism, every one of us has a male and female half, and before we came to earth it was divided, and it is reunited in marriage – We each have special qualities that enhance and add joy to one another – Men are more spontaneous, women are more grounded, and both are needed – especially for happy children.

 

So G-d loves love! which is unity.

 

Here is how you fulfill your soul’s mission – whenever you see someone, think, “this is the other half” (not necessarily “future spouse” but like a positive and negative magnet attract). When you have this viewpoint, you have an inner urge (attraction / love) to unite, create a friendship – imagine if everyone felt this way!!

 

Overcoming Resentment

 

Well the flipside to love is hate.

 

If you don’t know how to overcome the harsh sting of someone who is jealous of your happiness and you allow them to make you angry, now you have two miserable people!

 

As studies show, bullies are miserable – unfortunately they were also bullied, and we then develop a false shame-based-identity.

 

Everyone wishes to be praised and no-one wishes to be shamed – so if G-d forbid someone shames us and we then fundamentally believe that we are inherently shameful (bad, rotten etc.) we then need to pretend to everyone and ourselves that we are not!

 

This is called in psychology, narcissism, an over-inflated sense of one’s importance (which ironically is a reaction to the unwarranted hurtful destroyed self esteem – respect – love.)

 

Unfortunately once a person becomes a narcissist, they lose touch with reality – they are not aware that they have become vicious, cruel and evil.

 

So the first thing is to not consider anyone who was cruel to you as sane – they are insane. – For sane is what is normal and normally what a person desires is love, unity and friendship (This of-course is no excuse to shame someone back – for as the Jewish mystics teach “To throw mud at someone throwing mud, is to get just as muddy!”)

 

Additionally it pays to remember, that as one of the greatest Jewish mystical masters, The Holy Baal Shem Tov teaches, “When you find the good in the bad, the bad turns to good!” – So often in life we are sad – this usually is because we hoped A. would happen and instead B. happened; but by finding the positive benefit in A. so say you were late to school, however you were able to catch your breath and have a positive experience, you see A. not as bad but good – according to Jewish mysticism this is one of the purposes in life.

 

1. Self Discipline

 

Now in order to succeed in anything in life you have to have self-discipline – but how? – It’s actually pretty easy. By simply telling yourself “I will do x!” – You see it is a little like a horse and a rider. – Have you ever ridden a horse? – Well if you have, you know, that by moving the reigns in a direction, you tell it where to go. If you don’t move the reigns, the horse will gallop you to where it wants to go.

 

Our horse is our body that has instinctual desires, be it intercourse, drugs, food etc. Our mind is the driver – that is who we are – so if you don’t tell yourself what to do, it’s like a person sitting on a horse and wanting to go somewhere, but not instructing the horse!

 

It’s really just this simple!  The more you tell yourself what to do, the more the horse listens.

 

4. Gratitude = Happiness

 

Finally, being happy isn’t just important for you – it will effect everyone and everything you see. Because as quantum-physics has demonstrated to us, we all effect reality (in fact, today we know reality reacts to us and you can see how it literally takes on the emotions we give it (google Emoto.) So everything is actually mirroring your emotions – think about it – happy people seem to make everyone happy – depressed people make everyone somber, and angry people have a chilling fearful effect. – So if you want your world to be happy, you must be happy.

 

To be happy you need to celebrate – thank the One who has graciously given you what you have – for when you say “Thank-you”, instead of feeling you have been cheated, you realize you are fortunate! Instead of feeling depressed, you feel happy!

 

The best way to do this is threefold:

 

Firstly as soon as you wake up read a gratitude list.

 

The second is whenever something special happens to you – be it, seeing a friend – eating a good food – say thank-you (for someone made it happen upstairs.)

 

And finally, before you go to bed, think about all the good that happened to you.

 

Yep, it’s really just this easy – a life filled with meaning, peace (from purpose) Serenity / tranquility (from not getting resentful upset and angry) A life in which you drive yourself (not get driven by selfish desires that are killing people as we speak) And finally a life in which your happiness makes the world happy – are only four decisions away!