Life offers us two choices – the first is follow your desires – now desires range basically in two categories, the desire for or the desire against – for example, we have desire for intimacy, likewise a desire for demeaning those we believe are unfairly superior to us (hence antisemitism, bullying, terrorism) We have a desire against feeling pain, against feeling shame, hence the peacocking posture of a bully which really is telling everyone "I am so great you cannot shame me!" – The first category of desire ultimately relates exclusively to ourselves – However we have another category of desires which includes helping others – clearly Jews as the Talmud tells us are characterized by extraordinary compassion tendency – the thing is, like two drivers of one car: to the extent we are heading in one direction is the extent that we cannot be heading in the other