imagine you are designing a game – now this game goes like this – you create a character, and the way the character wins is by always becoming new – sort of like a flower that the way it wins is by always becoming a new flower – now in order for something to become new, something beyond the control of the person must occur – for that is death – just as a flower only is reborn after the death of its leaves from the last winter, so to a person can only become new if s/he is willing to (psychologically) die – but once a person can let go of the "concrete" identity – the self-perception – which they believe is themselves created in childhood, hence as it was created subconsciously – for example, I just met a woman who told me that until she was a teenager she thought she was Jewish because her family, devout Cristians had done so many Jewish customs, so as a Jewish child may assume from these variations that they must be something unique, different, have a Jewish identity, so did she – so we see identity is concertized through the subconscious assumptions made during a state of absolute openness – yet the one thing we loath the most is letting go of our assumptions – for we think this makes us wrong