Boundaries, the good the bad and the ugly

Boundaries are a very interesting thing.

Let’s begin with “Good fences make good neighbors.”

Without boundaries, what is yours is mine and what is mine is yours.

Good fences obviously give me and you protection.

As Kissinger quotes (which corresponds to a Talmudic teaching) “Better a dictatorship than anarchy” (for in a society without boundaries, more, not less people will be harmed; than even by a repressive dictatorship.)

But the implementation of boundaries ultimately must be self-imposed.

For anything which we choose not, is seen as an antithesis to our freedom – and by nature we are free people.

In fact, it is this very dichotomy, and dilemma, the pain and pleasure of boundaries, that pretty much sums up all morality.

Well let’s begin morality at it’s founder Abraham.

He was the first to live a selfless life.

Ironically though, he had two sons, one who maintained morality, the other who skewed selflessness into selfishness.

No offence, but the Arabs, the descendants of his second son Yishmoel, are the paradigm of this.

You see, perhaps the Arabs are the most hospitable people – I believe it is a rule in the Bedouins that you give even your enemy three days hospitality – I don’t know of many westerners who would randomly give anyone three days hospitality – but once he is out of your tent, you may (and many do) stab him to death.

On the flip side, came Isaac, very disciplined – he wouldn’t take a farthing from anyone – but likewise stifled in his absolute need for boundaries, he gives birth to two divergent paths – the first is Jacob, the other Esau (Esav.)

You see, Esav likewise was a strict disciplinarian – taking from their great grandfather Esav tremendous respect for elders, you could be put to death for dishonoring your father in Rome, as well as the literally millions upon millions they ruthlessly slaughtered, for here there were only harsh boundaries.

Along comes Jacob, the path of the middle between the extreme love and extreme boundaries of Abraham and Isaac.

The path of Jacob is our path, the Jewish way.

And it is as relevant to you and I today, as when Jacob founded it.

It is the true challenge in life.

For by nature, we are either like Abraham, open, loving, lacking clear boundaries (selfish love) or closed, disciplined and disciplining (harsh.)

But Jacob introduces the true path of enlightenment.

He was as the Bible calls it, “A simple man who sat and studies.”

And what does this mean (in contrast to Abraham who opens a free hotel, Issac who is the successful disciplined one) Jacob in fact seems extraordinarily ordinary – he gets into arguments with his father-in-law and his wife – he mourns twenty two years for his beloved son Josef.

And perhaps this is the secret, for in the end of the day, as lofty as Abraham and Isaac are, they are not ordinary – it is their very dedication to higher ideals that separates the holy from the mundane.

Whereas Jacob being simple, following the rule and regulations of God’s boundaries – leaves the I behind.