I think I finally figured us out – you see a person is a social creature hence we innately love, though this love is predicated on being loved, however as this is so desirable ( psychologist say we need love more than food and there are many studies documenting the permanent damage to those unloved, for example from Russian orphanages etc.) but the flipside of the desire for love is the desire to not be shamed – therefore as there is an attraction to people, there can equally be set up fairly easily fear

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